Cut the Crap
That’s enough! Enough faffing
Let’s get down to business
Cut the elephant shit
Pass me a slice overhear
‘How do you like it,
Over easy or sunny side up?‘
That’s enough! Enough faffing
Let’s get down to business
Cut the elephant shit
Pass me a slice overhear
‘How do you like it,
Over easy or sunny side up?‘
Wyoming, 1953. Interior: Homestead. No Boy. No Van Helsing Superstition plays stridently in the henhouse... —Eliza there is no genie, there is no bottle—it’s all in your head! Eliza looked at the genie and the bottle and smiled —And I am not Aladdin, I am Alan Ladd Eliza sucked the genie up with her pipette, filled the bottle, and sealed it with the orange rubber bung from her gingham pinafore, got up tutting, shook her pigtails and hollered. -Well,Silly old me, she said, I do go on sometimes, don’t I? How do you put up with me? Alan Ladd winced and smiled simultaneously. Good question. —What shall we eat tonight? —Dunno…mince? Better get some out then —Okay ~ Abingdon, 2002. Interior: Abattoir kitchen, morning. Tiptoe through the Tulips fills the air —Matter prevails over anti-matter, it’s self-evident, said Zak pouring yak’s piss over his brexit, slurping Jasmin tea, slicing a green banana, feeding a profound need to purge. —Yes, said Andreas Muggleton, hurry up for God’s Sake I’m famished. —Food is love and love is to be nurtured, said Zak, buttering wholemeal toast Bollocks, thought Andreas Muggleton, restraining his tongue till he got fed —How could you be wrong? —Here, get that down you —Wanker ~ Saragossa, last Tuesday. Exterior: Orange grove, dawn, two bodies hang, Yaketty-Yak blasts from the Tannoy Ferdinand and Isabella were not talking again. The silence was golden. Man, could they go on when they got started. Three days was nothing to them. Their record was six. They held the Bigmouth Ruler’s Cup eight years running. The novelty had long worn off. ~ Los Alamos, 1944. Exterior: Carwash. The Sun has got his Hat on sung by Billie Holliday, crackly car radio. -Oomph, that’s what we need. Oomph! -No mate, graft is what we need. Graft! Chain gang noises exercised Paul Muny and the Seven Dwarfs all morning -Hi-Ho! said Walt, dodging airborne digging implements. A nightmare in the dream factory, Walt’s Deepest secret fear. When will Herbie ever ride again? ~ Here, today. Interior: Coal Hole. Hit the Road Jack echoes from inside the big house. Witheld rang ten times Nobody answered twice How very remiss, thought a piece of wayward Anthracite
Conundrums scatter
splatter pellets eavesdropping
incendiary devices
hailstrom rakes still night
tickling all living all dead
~
Jade scarab beetle
Rattles gentle window pane
Psyche delivers nights
Between prayer and thought
Dwells mystical abundant
~
Incidental wireless
Wishes you were here
Butterfly shadow
Breaking up frozen window
Separating the pair of you
Here is the measure of my dreams
Green synchronic broach
Tom Paine quits Paris
Radical departure lounge
For America
Detained on entry
Political Booksmith
Bona fide fully fledged
Revolutionary
Common Sense applies
Mounties line the border north
Mexican bandits the south
You are surrounded
There is no way out
Remember the Alamo?
No, was it any good?
Groping around for
something to digitize—why?
Dunno—some farce of Hobbit
Said Dildo Dogends
Pulling on a Panatella
Dripping diamonds
Dong! Wednesday afternoon
schoolbell tolls for double English.
Today is plot and backstory.
Immersion in what-if’s and why’s
Tedious causality
What makes your characters click
Or does it, really,
does it make them stick?
~
Gaze out through translucent glass
Deserted whitewashed goal posts
Abandoned summer sandpit
Railway green rough shrubbery
Tops of posh detached
four bedroom dwellings
Cinereal heavens
~
The hut is stifling
Oil central heating
Fit for Kew Garden
Hothouse water lily pond
Encased in wrought iron glass
Tempting setting for
Clandestine assignations
Ruffled purple crinolene
loitering waist deep in lush plush blue grass Reginald Maudling resident garden tree gnome disappears most nights reappears most days
sitting on the edge
of the bed radio on
feeling half dead
sitting on the edge
of bed wasting time
dawn can’t be arsed to turn up
today could have let me know
Cherishing your privacy
Or just hiding from the world?
Playing the strong silent type
Imaginary friends collude
Lost poets of Antarctica
Cringeful pseudonyms adorn
Anonymous twitterings
Virtual condolences sigh
Haunt mysterious scribbles…
Thick primeval soup,
teeming in Amphibia,
living breathing gloop
Before the flood one could trudge
to Antwerp for ambrosia