Nowt kicked off (or so I’m told)

The sad old Sun still tries

to muscle in

break out, break in…

and have you heard?

The latest scandal,

the last straw:

No buses to Mortgagetown on Sundays

(and Bank Holidays)…

And there’s more…

No peas for the wicked,

It is rumoured

the pigs had them with the lobster.

No respect, these types.

Dyslexics with a read only memory,

they say,

lack self-knowledge.

Read and

right and wrong.

• Ooh-ah, Mrs!